Sometimes, we just want to jump straight into sex. But other times, we need a bit of gentle persuasion first. To get the body and the mind ready to go. To get the blood flowing in all the right directions. This is called foreplay, and here’s how it works – from the moment you start considering it till the moment it’s about to happen.
Time
Time is always an important factor. No matter your gender, the passing of time will eventually get you all worked up. It can take hours, it can take weeks, but it’s bound to happen at some point. You don’t even need much. It’ll come, believe you us.
But there are a few processes that can speed things up a little. And that’s what this is all about.
Kissing
Kissing is the #1 act of foreplay. It’s just the best. It has everything foreplay needs: physical touches, romance, smell, sight. You can do it slowly to build things up on a lazy Sunday morning, or go bananas in the kitchen after coming home late at night. There’s something incredibly sexy about having someone’s lips pressed against yours, someone’s tongue swirling around in your mouth, someone’s breath all over your skin.
You thought the Big Bad Wolf huffed and puffed? Wait till you hear your lover when you’re making out with their face 😉
Touching (1)
This one will be in two parts. The first part is going to be about touches that you didn’t think were necessarily foreplay, but totally can be. You may have heard about erogenous zones, right? They are spots on your body that bring you a little bit of tickly joy when they are touched. But you don’t necessarily need those. Basically, your whole body is one gigantic erogenous zone!
Seriously, you can pick any body part you like. Place your fingertips on someone’s knee and spread them, like you would while zooming in on a picture on your phone. Tickle their lower back, or all the way down their spine. Touch their bare skin right at the edge of their clothes. Place your hand on their hips. Everything works when the mood is right.
Touching (2)
Now for the really fun part: touching the parts that are actually known to do things to your brain. Squeeze their butt. Run your fingers down their chest, whether they have something there or not. Give them tiny kisses in their neck or below their ears, and tease your way up the inside of their thighs.
Touching the reallyreally fun places can be considered part of foreplay, too. It might be up for debate, but in our book, it doesn’t really count as sex just yet when you rub your finger over the zip of her jeans, or when you grab him through his boxershorts. The whole point of foreplay is to make them want it, and touching them like this will do just that.
Undress
Of course, you don’t have to be fully naked for sex, but it’s a lot easier, especially at first. And a good undressing strategy can just be the difference between them feeling like it or desperately wanting you. And this goes for all genders!
Ivy personally loves it when a boy pulls his t-shirt over his head and throws it away. Jace never fails to get aroused when a girl stands in front of him and slowly teases her jeans down to expose her undies. Don’t rush it, but take your time to undress properly. It’ll do magic for what’s about to happen.
Get some help
Sometimes, a helping hand is all we need. And there’s a lot of that out there. It doesn’t matter whether you like reading a certain type of stories, looking at classy photography, or prefer to indulge in some rough video material: whatever does the trick for you, does the trick.
It’s also a lot of fun to do this together. It’s super easy to combine with any of the other ways of foreplay. You definitely don’t have to do this one, but it could come in pretty handy.
Teasing
We could have called this “Touching (3)”, but we felt like this one deserves its own name. It’s perfectly acceptable to just dive in when you’re all naked, but there’s one extra step you could take to make things even more exciting. We’re talking about the final few moments before the actual sex happens. We just love a good bit of teasing.
There are infinite possibilities.
For boys:
- Tickle their balls with your fingernails
- Gently flick your tongue over the tip, barely touching it
- …or lick all the way up the shaft without touching the tip
- Grind your body against his
- Touch yourself while standing right in front of him
For girls:
- Circle your fingers around her nipples
- Kiss from her knees all the way down the inside of her thighs, stopping just before you reach the fun spots
- Gently lick every part of her V, but leave the clit alone
- Tease a fingertip inside her without giving her more
This is just a handful of ideas, but there’s so much you can do before actually going to town. Be creative, let the flow of things guide you, and play around with their body (and your own). You’ll find you’re going to be wanting it pretty badly, pretty quickly.